Showing posts with label Emmure. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Emmure. Show all posts

24 December 2014

THE WORST ALTERNATIVE CHRISTMAS JUMPERS EVER

We can all agree that Christmas is a time of great joy. It's a time of giving and love and snow and presents and food and well... a lot of great stuff. However there is a plight upon this, the most Holy of commercial Holidays:

THE ALTERNATIVE CHRISTMAS JUMPER.


These things are a plight upon the world and must be stopped. For future reference here is a list of the worst offenders so you can recognise the enemy when you see them. The appropriate course of action normally includes burning. 

10: Didn't even have the good graces to write "Sleigher" on it. Heathens.



9: If there was ever a jumper to punch your Nan in, it's probably this one.


8: Christmas; the season of bestiality and matricide. 


7: The album is a classic, this is just tragic. 


6: Nothing says Christmas like animal sodomy.


5: But it...

4: ...seems to be...


3: ...a theme.

2: There's going to be a new Christmas movie tradition started in my house this year. 


1: It really is that simple. Whoever thought of this should be forced to wear every single one of these things all at once in atonement to my eyes.